With all the recent hoopla surrounding Jason Collins coming out in the NBA (even though he's a 34 year old free agent who hasn't signed with a team yet) it was mostly missed that Roger Goodell, the commissioner of football, re-iterated the NFL's support for any possible gay players and that no harassment of said players should occur. Reading over the policy it seems pretty standard to one you would see at most any large corporation, but contemplating some of it bring to mind a myriad of things. Here's a section that deserves further attention:
HARASSMENT AND DISCRIMINATION
HARASSMENT AND DISCRIMINATION
Harassment can include, but is not limited to:
Unwelcome Contact: Any unwanted touching, pinching, kissing, hugging or deliberate bumping or brushing against another’s body.--hmmm, In the NFL this would pretty much exclude anything that happens on the field. I mean they tackle, pat each other on the ass, high five, hug in touchdown joy, pile on. I mean there's a wealth of touchy feely--ness going on in tight pants and jock-straps. So what's a boy to do?!
Jokes, Comments and Antics: Any jokes, comments or pranks regarding a co-worker’s sexual orientation, such as giving someone a sexual gag gift or having entertainment of a sexual nature take place to celebrate an employee’s birthday, etc.--okay, well this just takes all the fun out birthdays. What are the guys supposed to do if they can't get a stripper for their buds? I'll tell you now it's going to cause a severe drop in the need for strippers that's what. Strip clubs from Vegas to New York will slowly begin to close, more people will be out of work--bartenders, pole cleaners, those guys that do the buffets, trashy sequined out fit makers..I mean how many more people can go on unemployment in this country? Do we really need to take away jobs from the already unfortunate single mothers out there?
Generalizations and Put-Downs: Demeaning or hostile comments regarding one’s sexual orientation, including offensive or degrading words or phrases.---this one will definitely be hard for them. Use of the term 'faggot' has become so ingrained in their macho psyches, it rolls off their tongues as easily saliva. When you've been taught from the coaching hierarchy on down that the best way to anger and de-masculinize your opponent is to call them one, it's tough to change how you've been carefully taught. Just ask African Americans. Alas, this will also put an end to the oft quoted 'fuck you man!'
Pornographic or Suggestive Literature and Language: Pornography of any kind on bulletin boards, lockers, on someone’s desk or cubicle, or sent to co-workers via interoffice mail, email or text, fax, social media or voicemail. Any artwork, posters, photos, videos, screen savers, cartoons or written statements of a sexual nature.--Again, you are messing with an entire industry here, magazines, calendars, etc. of porn seem common place for these guys, but then if they don't spend the money there they will have more to buy extra expensive cars and extremely oversized gold jewelry and get more tattoos so those industries would be a safe bet to invest in. Though twitter could suffer since they won't be able to send out anymore 'dick picks' or "accidental" sex tapes. And really art is very subjective, one man's photo of penis is another man's Mapplethorpe, so whose going to be the judge? And if you are going to include cartoons then you may as well just ban all manga from locker rooms now.
Granted, no NFL players have actually come out yet (if at all) and though I kid here, it is still a good thing to make sure protections are in place if they ever do (while still playing and not after being retired for a number of years). Because athletes are just like everyone else and they need to evolve like the rest of us. Times change and we as humans need to change with them. What may have seemed right a few years ago doesn't necessarily hold true today. Societies and peoples who don't change and grow will either get left behind or vanish altogether. So mind your p's and q's and fu's and whatever else you let roll off your tongue, cause you never know, your best friend/teammate might actually "play for the other team".
Unwelcome Contact: Any unwanted touching, pinching, kissing, hugging or deliberate bumping or brushing against another’s body.--hmmm, In the NFL this would pretty much exclude anything that happens on the field. I mean they tackle, pat each other on the ass, high five, hug in touchdown joy, pile on. I mean there's a wealth of touchy feely--ness going on in tight pants and jock-straps. So what's a boy to do?!
Jokes, Comments and Antics: Any jokes, comments or pranks regarding a co-worker’s sexual orientation, such as giving someone a sexual gag gift or having entertainment of a sexual nature take place to celebrate an employee’s birthday, etc.--okay, well this just takes all the fun out birthdays. What are the guys supposed to do if they can't get a stripper for their buds? I'll tell you now it's going to cause a severe drop in the need for strippers that's what. Strip clubs from Vegas to New York will slowly begin to close, more people will be out of work--bartenders, pole cleaners, those guys that do the buffets, trashy sequined out fit makers..I mean how many more people can go on unemployment in this country? Do we really need to take away jobs from the already unfortunate single mothers out there?
Generalizations and Put-Downs: Demeaning or hostile comments regarding one’s sexual orientation, including offensive or degrading words or phrases.---this one will definitely be hard for them. Use of the term 'faggot' has become so ingrained in their macho psyches, it rolls off their tongues as easily saliva. When you've been taught from the coaching hierarchy on down that the best way to anger and de-masculinize your opponent is to call them one, it's tough to change how you've been carefully taught. Just ask African Americans. Alas, this will also put an end to the oft quoted 'fuck you man!'
Pornographic or Suggestive Literature and Language: Pornography of any kind on bulletin boards, lockers, on someone’s desk or cubicle, or sent to co-workers via interoffice mail, email or text, fax, social media or voicemail. Any artwork, posters, photos, videos, screen savers, cartoons or written statements of a sexual nature.--Again, you are messing with an entire industry here, magazines, calendars, etc. of porn seem common place for these guys, but then if they don't spend the money there they will have more to buy extra expensive cars and extremely oversized gold jewelry and get more tattoos so those industries would be a safe bet to invest in. Though twitter could suffer since they won't be able to send out anymore 'dick picks' or "accidental" sex tapes. And really art is very subjective, one man's photo of penis is another man's Mapplethorpe, so whose going to be the judge? And if you are going to include cartoons then you may as well just ban all manga from locker rooms now.
Granted, no NFL players have actually come out yet (if at all) and though I kid here, it is still a good thing to make sure protections are in place if they ever do (while still playing and not after being retired for a number of years). Because athletes are just like everyone else and they need to evolve like the rest of us. Times change and we as humans need to change with them. What may have seemed right a few years ago doesn't necessarily hold true today. Societies and peoples who don't change and grow will either get left behind or vanish altogether. So mind your p's and q's and fu's and whatever else you let roll off your tongue, cause you never know, your best friend/teammate might actually "play for the other team".
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